Welcome to I Hate My Roommate
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Welcome back to school! Tell us why you hate your roommate!
 1 day ago

I Hate My Roommate because she is a fake, backstabbing bitch!!! We moved in together being close friends and things weren't going too badly until she'd rely on me for all of her lifts to/from work and university (leaving her mess in my car and paying NO petrol money at allllllll). Also, she'd told me her password to Facebook--which i hadn't touched at all until things started getting awkward when she did come home--so i... [continue]

   Recommendation - . Unplug everything in the room except for one toaster. Pray to the toaster. Bring it gifts. Throw some of your roommate's possessions out the window. Say that the toaster made you do it.
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Southern California Institute of Arch

Beverly Hills, California
 2 days ago

I Hate My Roommate because she came in a yoko'ed the heck out of our situation. We used to do community groceries and shared chores. Now she controls her BFs (our other roommates) money, time and like. He SNEAKS FAST FOOD when she is gone because she is such a tyrant. She has some made up anxiety disorder that she made up to try to get closer to me and the 4th roommate. If no ones around to pay attention to her she is... [continue]

   Recommendation - . Keep a tarantula in a jar for three days. Then get rid of the tarantula. If your roommate asks, say, "Oh, he's around here somewhere."
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University of Phoenix-Metro Detroit C

Garden City, Michigan
 2 days ago

I Hate My Roommate because i was in sound sleep when my roomate's bf came in to our apt at 2AM in the morning, I mistook the noises as a burglar so I jumped up. Then was only told that he came over since SHE found a bug, more like a tiny beetle in her freaking room so she called him over! and he live 30 mins away! OMGGGGGG!!!!! now im lying here with my eyes wide open, now I cant go back to sleep again. you must... [continue]

   Recommendation - . Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors by your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning.
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College of Biblical Studies-Houston

Houston, Texas
 4 days ago

I Hate My Roommate because she bosses me around every single day. Several times per day EVERY DAY she'll come to me with some insane, arbitrary sin I have apparently committed. She'll get mad at me for not magically reading her mind. She also refuses to share any of the kitchen space with me other than a tiny top shelve that I can't reach. "Stand on a chair," she laughingly suggests. Meanwhile she has this huge drawer... [continue]

   Recommendation - . Buy a plant. Sleep with it at night. Talk to it. After a few weeks, start to argue with it loudly. Then yell, "I can't live in the same room with you," storm out of the room and slam the door. Get rid of the plant, but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant ever again.
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The Art Institutes of York-PA

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
 4 days ago

I Hate My Roommate because common sense is a far distance concept that none of them have the mental capacity to grasp. If money is a concern and you don't have much money the normal person knows to not buy things they can't afford. For example the other day my roommate was talking about how money is tight but then buys a new tv and for the past year goes out to eat for every meal. I am so happy you are moving out.

   Recommendation - . Hang a tire swing from the ceiling. Act like a monkey. If someone besides your roommate comes in, cease acting like a monkey and claim that the tire swing was your roommate's idea. When you and your roommate are alone again, continue acting like a monkey.
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Bethany Theological Seminary

Muncie, Indiana